That Time When Mommy Was Right

So I did some soul searching and decided that August needed to stay home this year.

My husband did not agree, and he and the nice people at the preschool convinced me to give August a go.

It did not go well. We’re on day two and I’ve already received two phone calls regarding his behavior.

Is it possible that Mommy was right? I think so. They’ve made all kinds of plans for how we can help him, but my gut is screaming “keep him at home with his damn mommy!!!!”

Honestly, I’m exhausted by all of this. Tired of trying to fit my square peg kid into a round hole. Tired of justifying the decisions that I know are right. Tired of worrying, tired of my life being ruled by other people’s ideas of “right.”

So I’m done. Louie is doing fantastic, which I expected. He’s loving the adventure and the opportunities. August? He’s hiding in corners and rocking back and forth. My soul is bruised and I can’t take any more of this. Next year August will qualify for Early Intervention Preschool and I feel confident that will be a good fit for him. If I have to round-up some kind of diagnosis to make that happen, I’ll do that. In the mean time we’ve got story-time, and playdates and other activities are small and less stressful–for August and for me.

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Comments

  1. Mommy.is.always.right! Stay strong!

  2. You’re a beautiful person besides for being right.

  3. Wish I could say it gets easier. I opened your blog, then had a conversation with my husband about our 11 year old daughter (2x-gifted and Asperger’s). I said, “I’m so tired of trying to fit the square peg in the round hole.’ Seriously considering pulling her out of school. She’s researching online school. Stay strong. Mom knows best, but that doesn’t make it any easier.

  4. I think the fact that they are calling you is an indication that they don’t know what the heck to do with August and are hoping that you do and will tell them the magic formula. Otherwise they should just be sending the information in a daily note or email. (Too many of those types of phones calls wrecks havoc with my emotional/mental health.) While it is a different educational level, it kind of reminds me of last year when several of the 4th teachers would ask me what I wanted my son to learn when I asked them how they were going to modify the class.

    While I don’t believe that mommy is always right, just because we moms have things to learn too. I do believe that all too often educators don’t really listen to what are experiences are. Like when I tell them my 4th grader was hitting because he knows his body parts, been working on them since kindergarten, he is just smart enough to ignore you when you ask because he deems it a stupid question.

    Good luck!

  5. Whenever I don’t trust my gut and then turn out to be right, it hurts as if someone punched me in the stomach. So why do I continue to doubt myself? Wish I had an answer. Guess I am not the only Mom that does this from time to time. This Mommy thing is tough! Good for you for doing what you know is right. Praying all goes well with August at home.

  6. Sounds like Mommy was right this time for sure, some kids just need more time at home before venturing out into the world, and that’s okay. Hang in there and do what you think is best for your kid!

  7. It’s amazing how people don’t listen to the Mom. Seriously… my son is 6 months old and I talk about my son and people just look at me like I’m nuts and then they notice exactly what I just described and act like they were the first to see it. Mothers get the shaft a lot, yet we are with the child the most!

  8. Noah did “early intervention” preschool from 2 1/2-3 years old and I regret every second. They were wonderful and amazing and did really good things with him… but it was too much for him. TOO MUCH. He couldn’t talk at all and couldn’t communicate. And I feel terrible that I stood by while he screamed and cried and begged me with his eyes to rescue him. Awful. At 3, he started in our county’s preschool program and it was amazing how much more ready he seemed. We still had a really rough 2 years there before starting Kindergarten. But I feel like he would have benefited more being at home with me for those 6 months, rather than being forced into a school environment at 2 1/2. Go with your gut!! You know him best and will provide him with equally important “early intervention.”

  9. I agree with you fully.
    Keep him home.
    he is young he is not going to miss a year and it allows him to grow a little.

  10. ((hugs))

  11. The Angel of PT, my daughter’s original spirit guide (a man, even) said to me, very early on that “Moms are ALWAYS right, 99.9 % of the time, they really do know best” and even when I doubt myself (more and more often, lately) I really ought not to. Follow your heart, Mama Bear.

    Powerhug.

  12. I say, “keep him home mommy!” You do know best! All three times we tried Bethany in school, two public, one very small, calm, and quiet private school she became so stressed out that she became anorexic. She lost so much weight that she was overdosed on her seizure meds which took over a year each time to balance out. And the seizures increased. She was literally so drugged up she couldn’t even sit up or having so many seizures she couldn’t function. Now We are keeping her home no matter what people try to tell us.

  13. Looking Up says:

    No one knows your children better than you do. Always trust your mommy instincts.

  14. ALWAYS do what you feel is right! I had to do the same for my boys this school year. I get it. xo

  15. Katy knows.

  16. I just found your blog and read the whole thing over the past week. I have really enjoyed your insights, therapy ideas, etc. My son has diplegic CP and I just quit my job (again) to stay home with him to try to improve his mobility before school starts in a couple of years. I just wanted to thank you for all your blog entries! — and yes, sometimes Mommy is just right! We know our kids best.