This I Can Do

graphic reading "Little Joy Map"

In my last Little Joy post I mentioned that I am not very good at physical affection. I’m terrible at it actually, but I don’t need to get real specific, right? I have discovered some semi-touchy-feely things that I’m very good at, and I thought I’d share those. Consider this affection for the touchy-feely impaired:


At the grocery after they screamed like maniacs through a trip to the hairdresser. In fact, we left before she could cut August’s hair. Hello, terrible twos!

  1. Bear Hugs–for some reason, these are better than the lame, barely-there hugs that are the norm. These can also include antics such as swinging, tickling, and other silliness that boys love (girls may love it too–I’m not sure).
  2. Pretend Danger–all of my kids like to be tossed onto the bed or the couch. I haven’t tested this with the baby, but the other three are all about it. Charlie also likes it when I go to put him on the floor and then STOP suddenly. And then do that like eight more times. It is guaranteed giggles every time.
  3. Mani/pedis. I know! This one is ridiculous, but here’s the thing–I am an Acts of Service kind of person. I do things for you and that’s how I show you that I love you. I have discovered, however, that there are things that are service that are also tactile. It’s funny because I have a very clean memory of helping my mother wash and style her hair when she got home from having a surgery to have cancer removed. That was my love in action. With my kids, I’m doing the same thing. I sat down with August and carefully trimmed his nails and cleaned out the dirt from under each fingernail. He say in my lap the whole time and really enjoyed it. With Charlie, his feet and ankles can get incredible tight from his cerebral palsy. I can take a little lotion and help loosen them up in the afternoons. Again, physical for them, but also an Act of Service, so something I’m very comfortable with.

I may not be an expert at this stuff, but I am getting better, I think.

No worries. I don't push the cart with Louie standing up.

No worries. I don’t push the cart with Louie standing up.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


  1. You are awesome! I love that you are okay with not being touchy feely, but have found some ways to express your love in a touchy feely way that both you and the boys are comfortable with.

  2. Sounds like you’ve got some good things going on here. I love the “pretend danger.” Kids always dig that 😉