Mom of Fraternals

It doesn’t take more than a passing glance to notice that Louis and August are not identical. It took a couple of days to see their differences–slimy, bright pink newborns all kind of look the same–but sure enough, Louis is olive complected with dark hair and dark eyes and August is very fair with reddish hair and blue eyes.

Most people look at them and comment on how they don’t look alike, which is fine, but some people have some very odd responses. Here are my two favorites:

First, at least once a week, someone leans over my double stroller, looks at my two boys, and exclaims, “well, they can’t be twins!” Um. . . excuse me? I assume they’re saying this because the boys looks so different, or because they’re different sizes, but really. If they don’t look like they’re nine months apart, I’m not sure WHAT they think I’m carting around with me. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m certainly not borrowing an infant to take around with me, and even if I did, I wouldn’t buy a special stroller specifically for that purpose.

The other one that got me was when a woman peered into my stroller the other day. Keep in mind, I don’t actually invite people to stare at my children, but twins are just one step above circus freaks and people don’t even try to hide the fact that they’re coming over to ogle your children. So she looks over my two guys and say, “not identical, huh?” To which I reply, “not even a little bit!” And then she looks back at them and says, “well, that’s OK.” Ummmmm. . . what? Of course it’s OK! Most people’s kids don’t come as matching sets and they seem to do just fine. I don’t know about you guys, but I prayed at night that my children would be healthy–not that they look like each other. Sheesh!




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  1. Aren’t people amazing? For the first year of Sophie’s life, she looked nothing like me. Several people asked me if she was adopted.

  2. I know a few people with boy/girl twins, and they all say that are constantly asked if they’re identical.

    • I’ve heard that as well. I guess some people just don’t know what to say, so stuff just falls out of their mouths.

  3. Get used to it, girlfriend. Bring on the circus! (and the silly comments) – it’s like the filter comes off when people see twins.

  4. Yep. People are idiotic about twins. I had a guy try to tell me that identical twins are twins that are born at the EXACT same time and fraternal twins are born a few minutes apart. Huh??? How does that even work?

    Your boys are adorable though! Absolutely edible! Personally I prefer frats to IDs (not that we get to choose), but I am so glad that no one mixes up my kids or even tries to lump them together as one unit. It drives me crazy that I can’t tell my friends’ IDs apart.

    • If that were the case, I don’t think anyone would ever have identical twins–can you imagine the pain?!?

      I went to high school with a pair of identical twins. I couldn’t tell them apart ever although many people claimed that they could.

  5. I get shocked at the general public, I too have twins g/g grace- with tanned skin brown eyes and brown hair, Ella – pale skin, blue eyes and what little hair she has is red.
    I hear the exact comments as you, also, people find the need to touch them, it infuriates me, I would never touch a random baby on the street, I have germs! I’d rather keep them to myself! But me being me, I just smile and try to scurry on about my business. Some day, when I’ve finally had enough I will tell someone that my baby has an incurable infectious rash, of course I will wait until after they committed the crime of pinching a cheek or rubbing a head – just saying!

    • Most people don’t touch, which is good. When they do, I usually just stand there in shock because I would never touch someone else’s baby.

  6. Strangest comment I’ve had about my twin boys, “are they both yours?” No, one belongs to my husband. Lol.

  7. People are crazy when it comes to babies, period. I’ve had complete strangers ask me if Austin’s dad has curly hair too. Once I actually said, “No, but the mailman did.” I mean seriously, I don’t know you from a hole in the ground…why would you even need to know that???

  8. OMG what bothers me to no end is when people pick a girl and say Oh this one she is my favourite you can keep the other one. Oh or when people say well you have three girls you can give me one! I mean really!
    Honestly I am relieved that my girls aren’t identical. It allows them to grow into their own identity easier I hope. I do worry that they may have to defend their ‘twinness’ when they get to school as they do look so much different.
    My girls though may not look alike but they look like their siblings alot so thank God I never had to answer that rude question of whether they are both mine!
    I have gotten so many strangers talk to me about the girls that it is freaky LOL

    They are wonderful your boys! I love love the alertness of them both in that picture.

  9. Never, fear. The comments stop when twins get older. Well, there are fewer comments when they get older. We still get some comments and questions, my girls are identical but are different sizes, but it is not anything like it was when they were infants.

    The best comments were always from other MOMs who had been there and made it to the other side.

    BTW, your twins are adorable.

  10. Out of all the tons of twins I’ve met in my life, I can think of only one identical pair. My God, your sons are adorable. Total baby fever over here now.

    • Thanks, lady! There are a lot more fraternal twins than identical out there–easier to make some extra eggs than to split one in half, I guess.

  11. Thanks for a good chuckle today. People are funny. Your boys are absolutely adorable! I like how they each have their own look. And, like someone else said, the comments will diminish as they get older. My twins are four now. They are identical, but don’t look a lot alike due to Phia’s brain damage and thus smaller head (plus the wheelchair etc). Rarely, someone will stare intently at both of them (looking back and forth repeatedly). I always know that the “Are they twins?” question is coming. I welcome that one — it is a million times preferable to the “What is wrong with her?” question I get too… But that’s another topic…

  12. August doesn’t look like Louis, but he looks like Charlie. A lot.
    I’m guilty, I usually take a look at babies in strollers. In my defense: I never touch them and I just say that they are cute without add comments.
    Beautiful picture!

    • I agree–I think August looks like Charlie too.

      I don’t mind that people look at my babies-I’m just surprised when people cross rooms or whatever to do it. They don’t even try to be discreet!

  13. They might not be identical, but they sure are gorgeous! They are growing so fast! Aren’t people so silly?

  14. That is funny! People are so funny. Well, those two are adorable and precious and healthy. Love their matching duds also!

  15. They are too cute. Congrats on expecting again. Never a dull moment, eh? Excited for you guys!

  16. it’s funny, i was talking about this recently with some other moms of multiples. people are dumb. that’s about all you can say.

    and there are times i wish my boys were fraternal because i can see so issues coming up with them looking the same, people not knowing who is who (heck, even THEY have trouble telling each other apart), etc. i just wish i could spare them that. but i guess, that’s all they know.

  17. ps they have the sweetest baby chins ever. i love little pointy baby chins. i could never stop myself from sucking on the boys’ chins when they were that age. sometimes i still do.

    keep me away from your children…

  18. Their cuteness is growing exponentially!

  19. The title of your post caught my attention and I had to “ogle”! My twins are soon to be 22 years old, and I still get comments about them. One is tall with brown hair and eyes, the other is 6 inches shorter with blond hair and hazel eyes. Even though they have an older brother, I had a few people tell me how nice it was for us to have adopted a boy the same age so he had someone to play with. They were 6lbs each at birth, and the only other thing that matches are my stretch marks !

    • HA! That is awesome. I guess I just don’t get why people expect them to look alike–you don’t expect regular brothers to be matching, right?!?

  20. Hi Katy,
    Both Louis and August are so precious! I have not visited your blog in a long time. Charlie is also so adorable! Congratulations on your pregnancy. Very exciting. Very blessed!

  21. People can be so very rude. Just like in the post I sent you. They always get up in my business. ha ha.