Well, the weekend brought more contractions, another trip to labor and delivery, and another round of Brethene. They sent me home with a prescription for a smooth muscle relaxer to keep further contractions at bay.

And they put me on bed rest.

It’s four days of bed rest and I am not handling things very well. Sunday was fine, but today both of my in-laws watched Charlie. It’s so incredibly hard to give up the control. It’s hard to be away from him. It’s hard to know what he needs and know that I shouldn’t be the one to give it to him.

Today after we’d finalized arrangements for the grandparent brigade that will be watching Charlie the next two days, I broke down and cried. For four years it’s been me: drying his tears, preparing his meals, and generally running the SS Charlie.

And now this. This is not a big deal. Even if I end up on bed rest for the rest of my pregnancy, that’s only for a couple of weeks. Almost anything can be handled for a couple of weeks. This is all worth it if the twins arrive healthy and ready to be taken home.

It still sucks, though.