Talking About It

There are things you do not talk about in polite company. Things that you avoid. There are rules for many things. For example, when I got engaged, I was supposed to tell my entire sorority at the same time through a very girly candle-passing ceremony. I had to keep my lips zipped for almost a month until we all got back to school. It was tough to do, but I knew that was the way it was “supposed” to be done.

This is a most-roundabout way of saying that I’m pregnant.

It’s too early to be talking about it. I hit ten weeks today, which is so very early, but then I got some more news and now I have to talk about it. This blog is my place where I talk about things and I can’t imagine not doing that because of social custom.

So here’s the deal: three days after Christmas I went to see my doctor and he was going to do an ultrasound so that he could pin down a specific due date. I’m notoriously bad at keeping track of my womanly cycle, so I was left with very accurate method of guessing when things might have occurred. Because of Charlie’s medical history, my new doc wanted no guessing–he wanted specifics.

I was really excited about this pregnancy. I vowed that I would do less worrying and more living in the moment. I worried all through Charlie’s pregnancy, and that didn’t help me one bit. I was letting myself imagine the best–a smiling baby, maybe a toddler who liked books, first steps, no ICU. I headed to the doctor happy to see if things were plugging along normally–wanting to see a heartbeat.

The doctor took a tad to0 long with the scan. I could see him flicking it around a bit and was immediately nervous. Could he find the heartbeat?

Actually, the holdup was that he found two. Yes, two heartbeats. As in twins.

Twin ultrasound

Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine that there could be two babies in there. Never. It was the furthest thing from my mind, which is probably why I had to ask the doctor about three times if he was kidding.I still can’t believe it.

Twins changes things. It’s still a little early to know if I will have two babies, but the chances improve by the day and I’d be stupid to not at least consider what a future with two babies would be like. For starters, that means at least a year of three children who can’t walk. A stroller for three? Well, thankfully, it appears that they make those. Now I just have to recover from the price tag. I’m going to need a bigger car too–three car seats ain’t fittin in the Taurus.

And then there’s the worry stuff. Bed rest is a real possibility and how can I go on bed rest when I have Charlie? What happens when the doctor tells me to stop picking up my heavy three-year-old? And what about complications? You can’t live in Special Needs Land without being aware of all the potential complications of two. I’m fine with Charlie and love him disabilities and all, but how on earth would I deal with more than one disabled child? More specifically, how will my back manage it!

OK, I’m getting ahead of myself. I know. I’ve always come here to let it all hang out and this is no different. I hope this is a great adventure that ends with me totally exhausted, but with two healthy babies. I don’t have a crystal ball, so I’m doing my best to enjoy the moment and not worry too much about what the future holds. There’sΒ  no predicting what’s up ahead. I thought I had already learned that lesson, but I just got one helluva reminder!

Guys, I was trying to respond to each and every comment on this post because they really do mean so much to me, but my blog has now marked me as spam. If I haven’t responded to you, I will try to get to them all in the coming days–apparently too many comments at once is a bad thing!

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  1. Oh, Katy! Wow! I can see why you had to talk about it–this is huge! It’s exciting and scary, too. Best of luck!

  2. Congrats Katie! I remember you finding out you were pregnant with Charlie. I can’t believe I have been reading you that long. I pray for a happy and healthy pregnancy with 2 happy and healthy babies on the other end!

    • It’s been quite a ride, hasn’t it? Blog turned five in November so I’ve covered a lot of ground in that time.

      • I swear you were just in AK teaching the other day….hmmm has it been that long…and holy moly 170 comments….good for you! I am jealous πŸ˜‰

  3. Congratulations! Worry is always there, but just slow down and breathe!

  4. Oh wow. Congrats, Katy! How exciting and scary. (and I’m more than just a little jealous! :) )

  5. AHHHHH!!!!!!! Katy! KATY! Congratulations!!!!!!! OMG! OMG! OMG!

    Yes, it’s a lot to adjust to. But you would have to do that anyway. Not that it helps. I wish I lived closer so that I could help.

  6. Wow! mazel tov.

    And it isn’t too early to start thinking about these logistics. Balance the good with the trying. It will be all right. It’ll be good. Stay well and happy new year.

  7. Congratulations, Katy! How exciting… I’m sure everything will work out. I’d say to stop worrying, but that’s impossible. Just enjoy those little lives growing inside you. What a blessing!!

  8. Katy; absolutely thrilled for you. Worry about the future later…it has a way of taking care of itself! In the meantime, just enjoy the amazing experience that you have been given. You do have friends here in NOLA, so please let us know if you need something, ok?

    • Laura, I swear you have the biggest heart. Thank you so much for that. If I end up on bed rest y’all will have to keep me entertained on Twitter, OK?

  9. You can do it-if you put half as much energy into twins as you do with your son you will be just fine.


    Okay deep breath. OOOHHHMMMM…. You can do this. Do not over think it. You are a fantastic mom!!! And you worried so much about that. And you have a fantastic support team. Look at all you’ve been through together and still all are speaking to each other!!!

    And if that woman with the god awful haircut can raise 8 kids, my Katy and her Hub can raise 3! With a lot of style and way better haircut!


  11. WOW! Talk about a big surprise! I am so very happy and excited for you and your family. I know all too well the worries of pregnancy when you have 1 child with special needs. I totally get it.

    I agree that writing about it is therapeutic and it can only insure a loving support team of friends (both in real life and those of us in your computer) who will rally around you in the months to come. Whether you are on bed rest, or not. If you have an easy pregnancy or a hard one. No matter what, we will all be here (and on Twitter) to see you through and to support you through each month.

    For now take it a day at a time, my friend.

    And smile at those sweet heartbeats beating in sync with your own. <3

  12. Congrats. All the best. If anyone can do this, you can.

  13. W.O.W. !!!! This is gonna be great for you AND for Charlie! I just know it.

    Remember that you’re not the first to have a kiddo with “stuff” and then go on to have another (or two!), so be sure to lean on those with experience, strength, and hope to offer you. Keep talking about it, we ALL wanna hear more!!!

    Feel good, babe!

    • Yes, Dani, that’s why I love the Internet–because no matter how crazy your situation, there’s probably someone out there that’s done it already.

  14. NEARLY exact same thing happened to me. Never, EVER, expected I could have twins. EVER. 1. It is amazing, and the BEST. 2. It is hard- so psych yourself up for 3-4 years of intensity. But you can do it. No way they would be sent to you if you weren’t meant for it. :)

  15. OMG! I am so happy for all of you! Charlie is going to be an awesome big brother :) Twins will be such fun, and double the fun for Charlie to play with them! Congratulations!! Sending up prayers that the pregnancy will go well and end well, you already have a beautiful family and are just adding two more to the beauty. Ya!

    • You’re so sweet. I think Charlie is going to detest the twins at first, but once they get past the screaming all the time thing, I think they’ll be good for him.

  16. Congrats to you! And I as well was shocked as heck when I found about my twins! And I had another one, but not a special needs one, but he was still less than two when they were born. I’m anxious to have you in some of the “multiples” spaces, because families with multiples and special needs are pretty common, as you know, you would have a lot to add. Welcome to the world of multiples!

    • I realized after I posted this that it probably wasn’t very comforting – the special needs and multiples things – I meant – there is no reason to think you won’t have two healthy, typical babies, with no bedrest and full term, and no restrictions! (I did have bedrest and complications, and somehow it worked out and I had two healthy full term babies in the end with a big brother who wasn’t at all neglected!). Also, that just when you think life can’t throw you any more curveballs, it does! It will be great though, I love having twins, even if mine aren’t typical – I’m actually a little jealous of folks that have typical twins! I can’t wait for you!

      • Jenny, I didn’t think it was at all out of place. I mean, I mentioned it first and of course, it’s just a fact. There are a lot of multiples in the special needs community. I’m going to do my best to stay out of Holland this time around, but I’m well-aware that it could still happen. At least I’m familiar with the ropes, right?

  17. Oh Katy, that is wonderful news! Congratulations. Must say that I kinda wondered when you did that post on baby names… :-) It’s great to be realistic about all the possibilities. Won’t know before you’re there, though. Try and enjoy as much of it as you can. (I’m also pregnant – also about 10 weeks. Huge but welcome surprise :-))

  18. Wow, this is wonderful news! Charlie is going to love those babies!

    I was really scared when I was pregnant with my son because my first pregnancy ended in a ruptured tubal pregnancy that almost killed me, and I did lose my baby. I kept waiting for the bad news to come, all through the pregnancy. Now, I regret the time that I spent being worried instead of enjoying the moment. I know how hard it is to push aside your fears, but just keep trying and trying and trying…

    Good luck and keep us posted!

    • Yeah, I regret all the worrying I did when Charlie was a baby and I didn’t know what he was going to be like. I mean, he was a newborn! I should have been pinching cheeks and snuggling. Such a loss.

  19. Kris Blamphin says:

    Katy!!! What a way to bring in a new year. Congratulations to you and your family. I’m quite sure that you will handle twins like evrything you do – you are superwoman! You are a great wife and most importantly, a great mom to Charlie. He is the lucky one because he gets a mom like you!

    • Ahhh, thanks. I’m pretty sure superwoman doesn’t take as many naps as I do, but I’ll take the compliments where I can get them!!!

  20. OH MY GOODNESS!!!!!!! Congratulations!!!! So happy for you guys & Charlie!! We have twin boys & it is SO MUCH FUN. So much work but so fun. It was terrifying to think of all the ‘what ifs’ while I was pregnant but we were so lucky to have everything go smoothly… no bed rest, no early labor. I hope it will for you too! Not that you won’t worry still, but I hope you can enjoy it too. :)

  21. Oh that news made my New Years day morning Katy. Congratulations!!!!

  22. What a wonderful way to start the new year! Speaking as a twin, having a twin is the most wonderful thing in the world :-) I will add you to my pregnant momma prayer list (I have friend who is expecting twins and another expecting triplets!). I look forward to following your journey.

    • Thank you so much–prayers has helped my family in so many other times and wonderful to know that people out there are rooting for you and for the babies!

  23. Yay!!! Congratulations!!!!!

  24. alexandra cunningham says:

    so happy for you – congratulations!

  25. OMG Katy! You made my new year with your news! So Happy for you & your family. You’ll get lots of good vibes, prayers & jingles from all over the interwebs. If anyone can handle this you can!

    • I am loving the idea of good Internet jingles! and thanks for the vote of confidence. I figure, I don’t have much choice–I’ve gotta do it!

  26. Wow, congratulations! My spontaneous fraternals were born in November. I still flash back to that day in the doctor’s office in April where a routine dating ultrasound showed two tiny heartbeats. I still look at my babies and am all “Uh, what? Why do I have 2 babies?”

    You’ll hear a lot of negative comments about bedrest, complications, etc., but it’s not a given. I had zero complications and made it to my scheduled c-section at 37w 1d. Both babies went straight to well-baby and came home with me and were good weights. My friend’s mom, my boss and other random people I’ve talked to have had similar experiences.

    If you aren’t seeing a specialist, I highly, HIGHLY recommend my MFM at Ochsner main campus. She was awesome and I credit her super careful monitoring with part of things going so well.

    Also if you haven’t picked it up yet, get a copy of Dr. Luke’s book. It’s an insanely high calorie diet that nobody can follow completely but there are lots of good tips on a high protein diet. I think that also helped me to make it to the finish line without any major issues.

    Good luck! When you are ready, there’s a local mothers of multiples group – and they have a huge garage sale coming up in the spring!

    • On this advice, we went straight to the bookstore and bought the book. Seems great–very well researched unlike some of the scary stuff I’ve been reading on the Internet.

      I’ll definitely look into the MFM as well–can never be too careful.

  27. Congratulations!!

  28. Julia O'C says:

    OHMYGOSH-OHMYGOSH-OHMYGOSH!!! Congratulations!!! I am SO, SO happy for you!!! And what a gift for your little boy! TWO siblings for him to love and to love him back!!!

    • I know, Julia! Won’t it be great for Charlie to have two of his very own cheerleaders? I’m pretty sure he’s going to hate them for a while, but hopefully we’ll get through it.

  29. Well, first of all, Congrats!!! I don’t have any advice for managing two newborns with a challenging child, but as far as the bed rest & pregnancy… I think you have a great support group and you will just have to ask when you need help! Don’t be afraid to ask for help and ask whenever you need it, and ask before you need it. It’s the only way I survived my second pregnancy.

  30. WOW! That is wonderful news!

  31. Wow, Katy!

    Hoping for the best possible pregnancy for you!


  32. Congratulations!!!! This is so exciting! What a wonderful way to start the new year!!

  33. Congrats! You are the second person in two days that I’ve learned is pregnant with twins. Try not to focus on the how will I ever do it, and just know that you will find a way. We always do!

  34. That’s is such amazing news!! I’m so happy for you! Congratulations. That IS big news to adjust to, but you’ll be a great mom to twins as you are to Charlie. :)

  35. Well Happy New Year ! Congrats – that is very exciting news !

  36. Gayle Gray says:

    Congratulations!!! What an exciting way to start the new year!!! 1-1-11

  37. Ruth Evans says:

    Congratulations!!! We were surprised with twins too, in our 3rd pregnancy. Life at first is crazy, but so wonderful. You’ll be in my thoughts. That is a beautiful sonogram BTW!

  38. Absolutely wonderful news to start the new year! Congratulations!

  39. OH WOW! This is just so wonderful! I am so, so excited and cannot BELIEVE how incredible it is. TWINS! TWINS!!

  40. I am an ECSE teacher, had been following your blog and got busy. Just got a chance to check back in here and look at this exciting news!!!! Congratulations! I wish you the best. You can do it. God is trusting you with these kiddos. He believes in you and you should believe in yourself as well. Best wishes to you all!

  41. Very happy for you, too! And not surprised – I was suspicious from that last set of family photos. Talk about limits on conversation in polite company!!

    ( I’m not in your sorority – read Cristina’s congrats on twitter….but I don’t mind not being in the first-to-know. I recommend you follow @PLAYTHISWAY on twitter – Dr. Jen, a pediatrician and mother of two sets of twins.)

    • Welcome to the sorority, Barbara. I think Twitter was the first to read this post today. Still not sharing on Facebook as it seems less personal than this space. Thanks for the recommendation–I’ll have to add Dr. Jen to my follow list.

      • Just to re-iterate what the mothers said below about fluid intake – dehydration was thought to be a cause when I had preterm labor (18 years ago). The whole frequency/urgency/restroom bit is the trade-off from 10 weeks of bedrest.

  42. Blathering says:

    Congrats! I can ask around for a triplet stroller; know a friend had one when she had her son then oops was pregnant again with twins. 3 boys in 13 months. Oops. She was full-term no bed rest with her twins and they are little wild things these days.

    • MelissaInk Designs says:

      I have two boys that are 3 years and 3 months apart, and I often want to jump out a window (thankfully, we live in a 1-story home). THREE BOYS IN 13 MONTHS! WOW!

    • I love hearing about these no bed rest mommies! Such a relief.

  43. MelissaInk Designs says:

    Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Congratulations! How flipping exciting! Thank you for sharing and best of luck with EVERYTHING. One of my resolutions is to visit two Louisiana cities this year – if we make it your way, I’ll be sure to visit. If you’re on bed rest – I will be bringing lots of freezer-friendly meals your way. I’m so happy for you.

    • Oh, Melissa, you really should head down this way. I think that New Orleans and Lafayette are some of the most interesting cities in the state, so at least check out one!

  44. OMG omg omg, I can’t even think of anything so cool and awesome as this! I admit to commenting before I even read this whole post; I just saw pregnant, and then twins, and I went into a frenzy. An absolute frenzy. I actually have tears. In my eyes. Katy congratulations times like, a million. Best. news. ever.

  45. Nora@Whitehotmagik says:

    Wow! I wanted twins but it is a scary thought too. It is a lot to worry about, plan for, be over the moon about. Praying for the best and for peace about all the things you can’t control!

    • Yeah, I think twins sound great in theory, but when I start imagining the reality–yikes! Both grandmothers have already threatened to move in.

  46. Congrats! It definitely sounds like the best thing is to try to take it one day at a time, as much as possible, and not let yourself worry over the what ifs. (Although I guess that could be said of any situation. But especially this one!)

    I guess this is the time of life where everyone I know starts popping out babies like crazy huh? It seems like everyone I know just had a baby, or just got pregnant, or is trying to get pregnant!

    • It does seem to come in stages. Hubby and I don’t have any friends who are geographically close and who also have kids, so it can be tricky. Someone will call and want to go out to eat at eight-thirty on a Saturday night and we’re like, “ummm. . . we’re putting Charlie in bed right now.”

  47. Congrats to you and your family! Best wishes for you!

  48. WOW!! I am so excited for you! I can’t believe you maintained your cool when the technician started to look nervous! You are such an inspiration because I am so worried about having another one after Lexie which makes me think we are done. But, like you said no crystal ball! Again, congratulations and don’t stress out, it will all work out day by day! Wonderful news!!

    • Well, Hubby and I never wanted Charlie to grow up alone, so we did want to have at least one more. It took us a long time to work up to it though. These babies will arrive about a year later than the big plan we made back when we were childless.

  49. How exciting! Congratulations!!! You are going to have boatload of fun at your house. The first years might be a weeeeee bit intense (and this, coming from a mom of a second-born single rather than second-born twins), but what a joy!

    May your pregnancy be a delightful time (okay…maybe “delightful” is going overboard…memory does tend to erase the less-than-delightful parts) of happy anticipation!

  50. OMG! WOWEE!!!! I saw your blogpost on FB and saw the U/S pick beside it and knew it was TWINS! I can’t freakin’ believe it! Welcome to the world of multiples!!! It’s a crazy ride but you can handle it. I already think you’re supermom!


    • Thanks, Cary! I showed Hubby that ultrasound and he had no idea what it meant! I told him to keep looking!!! It’s crazy to think about, but I’ve got some nice twin mommies out there (like you and Kelly, and Billie) who are my inspiration!

      • Yep…I showed my hubby a similar pick and he kept trying to figure out what “A” and “B” meant….hilarous to watch him. I had to tell him and then he just sat there with a stunned look on his face. It looks like they are in separate sacs and placentas…so that is very good news. “Safest” type of twin pregnancy.

  51. !!!!!!!!!Wowzers!!!!!!!!!

    This is SO exciting. And I WILL admit jealousy on my part because I always longed for twins.

    Can I live vicariously through you?

  52. Huge congratulations!! My friend has an AMAZING triple stroller. One that will let Charlie have the awesome riding high big boy seat too. It is narrow enough to fit through doorways at the mall, doctors etc, goes anywhere. A little heavy, but folds up quite nice. Might even fit in a Taurus trunk. I can fit three radian car seats in my cavalier and it’s narrower then my old Taurus. Very narrow car seats, a little $$$ but very highly rated. It is pain to put that kiddo in the middle however. Where there is a will there is a way and by your posts you seem the perfect momma to make it work.

  53. Oh wow. Congratulations! Sending loads of good thoughts and vibes.

  54. Wow! Congratulations! We had our twins before we knew the full story on our special oldest. We knew she had a language delay, but did not know the full picture of autism. It is a little different since she has no physical disabilities, but the first year was tough, I won’t deny. You are heading in with your eyes open, which is key, but worrying vs. proactive preparation is a fine line. One tiny piece of advice – the only thing you can do, that I know of, to try to prevent bed rest is to take all precautions against UTIs (drink lots of water and be very careful about your hygiene) because infections can start pre-term labor. That’s what happened to me and I wish someone had warmed me. Sending prayers your way!

    • Thanks for the tip! I’ve been slowly upping my intake even before I got pregnant, so hopefully it won’t be a huge adjustment for me to get enough water.

  55. Congratulations! Twins are such a wonderful blessing! (Twin mommy myself, so I totally believe that!) Charlie is going to love being a big brother!

    • Glad to hear that you’ve been happy with your twins. I think Charlie might want to kill them at first, but it’ll get better when they’re a little older.

  56. Wow! As a twin mommy myself all I can say it’s amazing and you will have your hands full. 20 weeks along with our third I have similar concerns as you, hoping I can get this baby to term and avoid bedrest. Twins were 30 weekers. I am also concerned about having a non walking baby and non walking toddler and also a walking toddler. Drink more water than you can imagine is my twin pregnancy advice. Excited for you and Charlie. Lucy is Drakes biggest motivator and I am sure these sibs will help Charlie grow leaps.

  57. Congrats! I’ve been thinking you were pg with all the baby name talk going on!
    Wow! Two babies!!! So exciting for you!
    It will be okay. Be happy about it, enjoy. The odds are with you now!

    • Yes, I’m pretty obvious. Baby names are the first thing I think of even BEFORE I know I’m pregnant. When I’m just thinking about being pregnant. Two babies makes it that much more to think about it!!

  58. Incredible news! I am thrilled for you, and somewhat jealous I must admit. Hoping all goes well, and Charlie will have two amazing little siblings. You will find a way to manage in the short term, and in the long term it will be so wonderful – Congratulations :-)

  59. Congrats!!!!!

  60. Congratulations! I’m thinking very happy thoughts only. Yippee!

  61. Congrats! It sure seems like you are starting off the new year with a bang!

    My girlfriend has twins that are 16 months old now (and she also has a 5 year old boy) and I have to say watching her navigate twins wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. They play together quite nicely and maybe it will be great for them to have an instant playmate while you have to do some special things with Charlie (like ABR!).

    Good luck for an UNeventful pregnancy from here on out!

  62. Congratulations! You’ll be a great mom of twins, and I’ll bet Charlie will love having siblings (most of the time).

    Having been down the twin road myself, and my twins experiencing TTTS (twin-to-twin transfusion syndrome), I have to give some advice, though: have regular ultrasounds to check that things are okay. Also, trust yourself, and if you ever feel something is wrong, have it looked at right away.

    Most twins are born healthy and close to term, and I certainly hope this will be the case for you. Congratulations again!

    • I’m hoping for close to term. They seem to be in different sacs so I’m hoping TTTS is not a problem, but of course, anything can happen when you’re pregnant–twins or no.

  63. I just woke the sleeping boy next to me I gasped so loudly ! CONGRATS! What an adventure , what a wonderful blessed, unexpected, fantastic , scary but amazing adventure!! I am thrilled for you – and have tons of baby girl things being set aside as we speak if you want it πŸ˜‰ Wow!!!

    • Oh, yes, put them aside! I’ll be hitting up garage sales in the spring once I’m sure what’s in there, but my gut is telling me it’s at least one girl.

      It’s some seriously crazy news, but I guess somebody’s gotta have the twins, right?

  64. Katy, WOW WOW WOW! CONGRATULATIONS! How wonderful! I know it probably seems so overwhelming and there is a long road but what a gift! I just wanted you to know I am cheering for you and am just so happy for your rapidly expanding family :-)

    • Thank you, Marcela. I know you had some rocky moments with Belle, and look how wonderful she’s turned out. I think it’s always a little tough when you know first-hand how bad things can go. But I’m trying not to think about that! I’m trying to think about healthy babies.

  65. Oh Katy, what delightful news! Any baby is a wonderful baby, I guess two is just twice the wonderful! Do think about healthy babies – don’t borrow trouble. I spent this evening at a dinner party with some very old friends of mine who have three year old twins – pretty much an exepectable outcome for twins – 35 weeks gestation, one smaller than the other and he stayed longer in the hospital but only in well baby, they are absolutely fine and their mom is let”s just say not young, so odds didn’t favor her outcomes and still these kids are great. Most pregnancies and births are. We are just special to get it both ways! The most important thing is how much you love them, and obviously you are very good at that, so strap in, hang on and expect your joy level to rise along with your workload. So happy for you!!

    • Ahhhh. . . are you calling me young? I will TAKE IT! I don’t think anyone’s called me that in quite a while.

      Yes, you are right–most pregnancies and births are fine. I had a good pregnancy with Charlie so hopefully this one will be the same.

  66. You are amazing Katy and you know so much more now than you did when you had Charlie which is a good thing too! I can’t wait to see photos of your “covered” belly. You are a great Momma. Love Sandi

    • Great reminder! I do need to take a few pictures of the quickly growing bump! I swear, I’m barely pregnant and I’m already starting to show.

  67. Congratulations!
    I’m sure you will handle everything and anything that comes your way…that’s what you do already with Charlie. I don’t blame you for being overwhelmed, and I know what you mean about getting ahead of yourself, but try to do the best you can to relax.

    I’m due in a few months…seems like a lot of bloggers I read are due this year. Hopefully that’s a good sign for us all! :)

    • Thank you!

      Love the comraderie of the blogosphere–everybody having babies at the same time. Such a lovely thought.

  68. So. Very. Exciting. Best wishes on this exciting jouney.

  69. Yippy!!! and……Holy Cow Twins!!!

    Hubby and I just had the “are we going to go for #2” talk yesterday..again. I didn’t even think about the possibility of twins. Yikes! We weighed in on all of your current worries.

    We came to the conclusion that there just isn’t a perfect time or a perfect way to have a child.

    Everything works out. It has too.

    • Yes, that was pretty much my husband’s opinion. It’s like, well, we’ll figure it out.

      Never in all of our baby #2 talks did we ever even consider twins: I’m under 35, there are no twins in my family–I guess this does happen, but it sure is a surprise.

  70. Wow! Congratulations to you and your family! I hope that this pregnancy and deliveries are complication free and that 2011 is the best year yet for you and yours.

    xoxo and huge congratulations!

  71. Congratulations Katy! I can’t imagine all the stuff running through your head! You’re right about trying to enjoy it. I guess when your brain starts doing the “disaster avalanche” like mine does–just take a big deep breath. You can totes do this, and I think the other poster is right–if you give your babies half the attention you do to Charlie, it’ll be GREAT.
    I also think siblings will be wonderful for Charlie–and for you and the hub. Our second (typically developing, but almost born waaay earlier than Elena) is a gem, and we NEVER take anything for granted. It is wonderful. And hey, if you have to be on bed rest–well, you’ll never be lonely with this blog!
    Here’s hoping you lots of rest, a blissfully uneventful full-term pregnancy, and lots of great new things for Charlie this year!

    • I know many parents who had a disabled child and then a typical child and they all report the wonder of watching a typical child develop. I hope it’s that way for us.

  72. omg how wonderful!! I’m so happy for you K.! Take it one day at a time and everything will be just fine!!

  73. Happy Dancing for you! Woot!

    And……a candle passing?

    Are you LDS? Candle passings were all the rage when I went to BYU!

    Tammy and Parker

  74. Congratulations! That is wonderful news! A DOUBLE blessing! I grew up wanting twins since they run in our family (wasn’t meant to be for me). I am SOOOO excited for you! Praying you are able to enjoy every minute and not be overcome by worry and crazy thoughts (and for healthy babies too!).

    • I thought twins would be fun until I had one baby and realized how much work just one is! I knew then I could “never” handle twins. I guess that’s just the way things go. We have a plan and God has a plan and they aren’t always the same.

  75. Oh, Katy!!! I cried when I read this post–I’m so excited for you!I don’t even have the words to tell you how happy I am for you. I have a really great feeling about this. Congratulations, my friend!!

  76. Didn’t see that coming. I am-jaw-on-the floor shocked! And as a religious reader of your blog / baby nut SO FREAKIN excited. Congratulations Katy :) To quote the words of a cheesy country song sung by a person whose name escapes me:

    Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, that’s why it’s called the present.

    Obviously, I don’t know you in real life, I only know what you write about your family, but I’ve been meaning to tell you for such a long time, that as a disabled adult, you’re attitude toward parenting Charlie warms my heart more than I can tell you. You push Charlie, and have goals for him, but you also embrace him exactly as he is, which is so refreshing. Too many people get stressed and anxious over “the goals”. Disability is a common part of the human experience, not something in desperate need of a solution. It makes me hopeful for Charlie’s generation of disabled people to know that there are moms like you out there, who share that point of view.

    I’m yammering, but my point is, you are a super-wise woman, and you can habdle whatever lies ahead. Congrats again to you and your husband. :)

    • Thank you and thank you for your words on disability. I spend a lot of time trying to talk to people in my life about the balance between giving my child the best life possible and letting him know that he is loved and valued just the way he is. I’m sure I don’t do it perfectly, but I try.

  77. Hi. I am late reading this, but supremely excited! All I can say is, if someone had told you before you had Charlie that you’d be capable of doing everything you’re doing, you might have found that hard to believe. And so as intimidating as two additions may seem, you WILL deal. I know.

    Please try to not let your mind go to the idea of complications. Plenty of women carry twins with no troubles. You’re young, you’re healthy. The odds are with you, my friend.

    ALSO: Two little siblings for Charlie is doubly wonderful. I can’t even begin to tell you how much of an amazing influence Sabrina has been on Max, when she’s not torturing him, that is. (Girls!)

    I am so thrilled for you guys, Katy.

    • Yes, well, I am hoping that siblings will help push and challenge Charlie to do new things.

      I’m not as worried as I may seem. I am VERY worried about logistics, but my first pregnancy went very well, so I’m hoping the second will go smoothly as well. Of course, like I said, no crystal ball here.

  78. Just wanted to say another congratulations!!!! We have twins, they were our first and I know the excitement combination fear we had with the two. One of my sons has spina bifida so we have our share of figuring out how to balance extra appointments, therapy sessions, etc. while trying to just have a regular life with two toddlers. I know having an older child in the mix with twin babies will be a different ball of wax but from what I can tell reading about you, you can certainly handle it!!! :) WIshing you all the best!!!!

    • Thank you! I’m glad you are figuring out the mix of special needs and multiples and hoping I will be able to do the same.

  79. Been mostly offline this weekend but finally so happy to read this news! Congratulations and best wishes and all that…but wow. Twins! :)

  80. Thrilled to read this! Seriously, THRILLED. I know it has to be scary, but focus (as you are) on the good things to come. TWINS!! What a shocker. :)

  81. Wow, wow, wow, wow, WOW!!!!! Twins, how exciting and overwhelming all at the same time. What did your hubs think when you told him?

    And please, try not to worry about all the details too much right now. I know you do have to think ahead about some things, of course but I know it will all work out for you.

    Excited to meet you in a few weeks… xo

  82. Many congratulations, Katy. Let the games begin!

  83. Katy, you’re gonna be a great twin mom. I’m thrilled for you. And it’s gonna be great for Charlie too.

    (I have twin boys, one with “undiagnosed” special needs, labeled as CP but who knows where they came from? They were born at 38 weeks with no complications.)

  84. Oh Katy, I am SO happy for you! And I’m so, so happy to hear about your determination to really enjoy the pregnancy and try to be as anxiety-free as possible. We may start trying again this year and that is a goal I’d like to achieve as well. I’ll be looking forward to hearing your tips on how to be pregnant with a non-ambulatory toddler!! :) Best wishes and *squee!*

  85. Almost didn’t comment as all has already been said. Just wanted to drop a note to say that I am rooting for you and ALL of you chillins. As you said, living in SN land makes you afraid of anything that would add the words “high risk” to our files, after all, we’ve been on the wrong side of the odds before. But do try to focus on what others have said, that there are so many full and full-ish term multiple pregnancies that turn out fine. We are just warped by the fact that the majority we know of turned out less than ideal by virutue of the circles in which we run.

    Oh, and FWIW, I think I may have posted this on Fletcher’s blog, or on my surrogacy blog so forgive me if I am repeating myself, but during my third, maybe fourth, IVF cycle, my acupuncturist recommended I find a mantra (which was a bit too new age for me) so my mom suggested Romans 12:12: “Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, steadfast in prayer.” I think this might be something nice to remember during your pregnancy. The complications may come, but, as us SN moms have learned, don’t borrow trouble. Be joyful in the hope of a long, uneventful pregnancy, and when and if affliction comes, you can deal with it then.

  86. Congratulations! I don’t know much about special needs or babies or pregnancy but I read your story because you seem like such an inspiring mom. I think you will rise to whatever challenges lie ahead of you.

  87. Well here it is. A warm wonderful congratulations!!!

  88. Tammy Edwards says:

    Congrats!! What a wonderful surprise. :) Take it easy and slow and don’t forget to eat for three!! You and the Twins!!

  89. Katy,

    If it makes you feel any better, I got to 34 weeks with no restrictions….I know everyone is different, but…I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you. Your momma will have to help you out for sure!
    Congratulations again!

  90. I can’t think of another mama who has better proven how capable she is at taking what life brings and making something terrific out of it. Everything is going to be just fine. Blessings!

  91. Holy Cr**!!!

    I’ve been away from the blogosphere for a few weeks, ( a much needed break) and look what I miss!!!


  92. Congratulations!! Having two sets of twins I can say it is wonderful! From all that I have read on your blog you sound like an amazing mom who will handle twins well.
    My first born daughter is a twin who was born at 29 weeks. She has CP and is doing really well. Needless to say I was extremely worried of having the came outcome with my second set but the pregnancy was entirely different and they arrived at 37 weeks with a scheduled c-section. No one knows all the answers, but it helps to be hopeful and positive. Best wishes and if I can help you with the logistics of getting around with three children that don’t walk let me know. Congrats!!


  94. Here it is, buried in my Google Reader! Ah! So excited for you and yours. You’re an incredible mother and Charlie and these two little kiddos are just the luckiest.

    Congrats, Katy!

  95. Wow, congratulations on having TWINS!!! I know I would be slightly excited but actually totally nervous if it were me! I was super sick this pregnancy in the beginning and SO afraid I was having twins!!! Those newborn weeks are so difficult anyway, I can’t imagine having two newborns!!! :) I will be praying for you as your family grows – so happy for you!!! :)